We just completed a workshop on Emotional Intelligence and Mindfulness in the workplace. First of all, what an amazing panel: Tom Blonski, President and CEO of New Hampshire Catholic Charities; Pubali Campbell, Founder of Bikram Yoga Manchester and Deb LeClair Psy. D, of Sojourn Partners had such great insight and suggestions for all of us. With over 60 people registered our participants shared the key concepts that they learned:
Mirror Neurons Brings On Leadership Responsibility
We connect emotionally to each other through mirror neurons in our brains. This means that we are predisposed to mirror each other, whether we are aware of it or not. Why is this important in leadership? Because as leaders, our teams may be mirroring how we react to events. If our leader is outwardly despondent over something, for example, our team will feel and do the same. As leaders, we have a responsibility to manage our emotions.
Don’t Fight Your Imperfections
How to manage our negative self-talk? Admit our imperfections. If we have the courage to say “I struggle with speaking” or “I need your help” or “I am working on getting better at this,” we actually come across as stronger leaders. Why? Because we show we are human. If we stop fighting our imperfections we are able to be in the present moment. Westop worrying about what we need to do, could have done or should have done.
Assume Good Intentions
What if we could remove all judgment from how we interact with others? Start by assuming positive intent. Then approach another objectively and from a place of curiosity, you might ask:
- What is going on?
- What is another way I could look at this situation?
- What value of mine or theirs is being met or blocked?
- What do I really want?
- What do they really want?
Connect with Your Team
Connecting with people before heated situations arise helps us to know and believe in their good intentions. If we know, respect and appreciate our co-workers then we can work through situations with respect and civility.
So what is next? Our participants from today suggest that you start small.
- Add Mindfulness into your day: Even if it is just for a few minutes. Get in the present moment by noticing what is going on for you now: Your breathing, how your foot feels on the ground or what noises are around you.
- Set your intention: how do you want to show up to a particular situation. List 3 adjectives you want to leave behind? What is the impact you want to have on others? How do you want to come across to them?
- Notice what your body is telling you. Are your teeth clenched, shoulders tense or are you full of energy? Use this knowledge to name your emotion: “I’m angry,” “I’m anxious,” or”I’m excited.”
- Get to know each other as people by adding some social time: eating together, helping each other out when things are rough, doing something that shows you appreciate them and their work.
- Talk! If you are struggling with a particular person or team, have an honest conversation about what is going on for you or for them.
- Stop and listen to others without distraction or judgment.
- Take the time to ask people what they need or want.
We hope that those who attended enjoyed the program and invite them and all of you to “Save the Date” for our next workshop scheduled for Thursday, May 8th 2014 on “Leadership through Adversity”. More information will be following on this and other events, but you can always see what’s coming up by checking out our Events Page.