The Conflict You Can Live With

by | Blog

When you recognize conflict, you are seeing an opportunity unfold itself. I’m sure that makes no sense to you, but it’s true. Conflict is the reality of friction that is there whether you want to recognize it or not, and if you decide to recognize it, and face it, you are moving towards resolving it.

First, what is conflict exactly, and how do we recognize it? Is it a big ugly disagreement – something that has been festering for a while? Certainly, yes. But it is also that peer disagreeing with you in a meeting. It is a passive aggressive look, an intuition you have, and a flat out “NO” from your boss. Conflict is everywhere and built into our systems for deciding things (like congress) and part of our human nature (like the relationship you have with your mother in-law). So, embrace it.

If we walk through our professional life trying to avoid conflict, we are basically deciding to lead nothing and be a part of the status quo. If we decide that we will shut down when faced with it, we are the victim and all too often find ourselves in a position of unhappiness. Think of a time when you just stepped around a conflict, maybe something even happening in your life now. The conflict is still there, and in time might be made erroneous, but until then you are stuck with the ugly unfortunate issue that you cannot resolve.

On the contrary, if we decide to face conflict head on and decide to learn and use the tools to resolve, advance, and even champion conflict, we will be engaging our world in a powerful way. Think of any conflict you have faced directly. Even though it was hard, I bet your reflection on it is positive. Facing it resolves some matters for you.

A lawyer friend of mind told me “if a town has one lawyer, that lawyer is poor, but if there are two, they are both rich”. Lawyers know how to see opportunity, and if they are doing their job, they resolve these conflicts, keeping society running.

About Sojourn

Sojourn Partners is a results-driven executive leadership coaching firm that empowers the professional workforce to think differently in order to realize the full return on investment in themselves and their companies. Professional leadership thinking and intervention, based on years of research and experience, place Sojourn Partners at the forefront in executive leadership coaching, organizational development, strategic planning and culture and climate change.

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